Episode 32 -- "She's dressed like a boy"

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“When our daughter went to school dressed as The Gruffalo (for World Book Day) another child dressed as a Disney princess commented ‘...she’s dressed like a boy’ and my daughter became immediately self-conscious. 

The majority of girls were dressed as Disney princesses, our daughter would probably have been delighted to go as a princess but in my desire to show her an alternative (I’m not a Disney princess fan) I feel like I’ve subjected her to unhelpful comments. She was excited to go as and enjoys dressing up as The Gruffalo at home. 

Is it ok as parents to encourage our kids not to feel like they need to be like everyone else?

I’m currently in control of buying costumes and toys and veer toward gender neutral (she’s nearly 4 years old) am I hindering her emotional development by not buying into the Disney princess world? Am I being too controlling? 

Even when she dresses up like a Disney character (Moana) I encourage her to say ‘I’m a superhero princess’. I want her to feel there are no limits on who she can be. I’d love it if she grew up to be whatever made her happy; if this is DJ-ing on the Island of Ibiza, brilliant! 

I desperately want her to never feel she needs to follow the crowd but don’t want to be an overly controlling mother and subject her to unhelpful small minded comments.”